To the Mama Trying to “Get it Right,”
I hope this post finds you well, but chances are that if you are on this site, “well” is not among the list of things you are probably feeling 😞. That’s okay. The important thing is that you’re here because I have something I’d like to share with you. A couple of weeks ago, I had the privilege of leading a workshop on fighting fear, and today, I wanted to share some of those insights with you:
- Parenting can be overwhelming, and it’s completely normal to feel fearful at times. That anxious feeling in the pit of your stomach when you’re navigating the complexities of raising teenagers, is something many of us can relate to. It comes from a place of love, but unfortunately, it often works against us. During the workshop, we discussed seven ways fear can hinder what we want as parents. These include decision-making, communication problems, stress, micromanagement, influence on decision-making, modeling behavior, and missed opportunities for connection. Recognizing these obstacles is the first step towards overcoming them.
- Name It, To Change It. To combat fear, I shared a personal “cheat code” I call “Name it to Change it.” By identifying and acknowledging our fears, we can begin to examine our perspective and approach. Once we are consciously aware of what are fears are saying, we are better at applying reason and logic to them and deciding how to respond in a way that aligns best with the relationship we truly want with our child.
- Fear Triggers. As parents of teenagers, we face a variety of fears and concerns, such as safety and mental health issues. These fears can be triggered by specific cues, situations, objects, or events that elicit fear, anxiety, or stress responses. It’s important to reflect on our own fear triggers and how our bodies react when encountering them. Understanding these triggers can help us make sense of our reactions and better recognize when we are experiencing fear in real time.
- Face it, Head On. During the workshop, we also discussed the importance of taking time to reflect and process emotions like fear rather than pushing through and avoiding them. Avoiding fear can lead to future burdens, so it’s crucial to find ways to no longer align with it. Feelings of fear and dread are results from subconsciously choosing to believe the story fear tells us. There are warning signs that indicate when we are walking in agreement with fear, such as a waning spirit, a loss of balance, and a sense of unease.
It was so great to be together in a space with deeply loving, committed mamas who are all working hard to bring healing to their families. The workshop is a wonderful opportunity for us to come together, share our experiences, and learn new strategies for managing our fears.
If you want to join us for the next session on December 7th, 2023, I encourage you to register. It’s free and one more step towards a more confident and effective parenting journey.