To the Mama who feels like she’s doing it wrong, I see you.

I put so much time and effort into trying to respond appropriately to the situations life seems to hurl at me like a fastball. Yet, even with all that effort, I continue to find myself sitting alone with no one beside me but regret.

I spoke too harshly.
I withheld my love when I was angry.
I rescued them from something they were meant to endure.
I was bitter, and I could’ve been loving.
I was prideful instead of giving grace.
I was irritated instead of patient.
I was frustrated instead of calm

The list could go on and on. There’s no shortage of moments to remind us how we could show up better. It’s like a shiny, red ticket dispenser of my failures, and my mind can’t wait to pull the next one.  I’m tired of it. Aren’t you? I’m ready to rip it off the wall and toss it in the dumpster. Why is it even there? What purpose is it serving other than to break me down as a mama?

“When we are no longer able to control a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
Viktor Frankl

But how do I change myself? How do I reframe the seemingly endless stream of shortcomings secured to the wall in my mind?  Well, I could start by being kind to myself.  What if, instead of viewing each thought in as an example of where I lack, I looked at it as an invitation to where I might grow? What if I viewed them as reminders that I was human? I could look at each thought as another example of where I failed, or I could look at it as life nudging me towards learning what I need to become a better version of myself.

Perhaps our inner critic is not meant to break us down as mamas; instead, it’s meant to challenge us to become who we were always meant to be.

Sometimes the difference between strife and peace in our spirits is just a tiny shift in our thinking. Each mistake is an opportunity to do better. Each unsuccessful attempt is not a failure; it’s a reminder that we still have growing to do. Here’s the thing, while I may not be o.k. with failing, I am o.k. with growing. So..that shiny, red ticket dispenser can stay, and I can assign a new meaning to it.

What are you struggling with today that could benefit from a shift in your thinking?


P.S. 💙Special Edition: Interview with a Mom 💙
In episode 9 of our podcast Unyielding, I had the honor of interviewing an incredible mama who was brave enough to share her story, her regrets, and the one piece of advice she has for you…. mom to mom. You can find it on our website, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or your favorite podcast platform.


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